Last Saturday I witnessed something that made this mama’s heart swell with pride. I knew I wanted to share it here, as soon as I could find the right words. Of course we like to share our kids’ triumphs, but sharing this is more about encouraging all of you mamas out there who are in the daily trenches – where exhaustion runs high and showers are scarce.
A quick look back. I am a mother of three boys; twins plus a singleton. I had three under three – all wearing diapers and all needing me, a lot. It was the most physical and emotionally trying season of my life. As a woman who went to law school and ran marathons, I don’t say that lightly.
I was on my knees constantly, in prayer as well as changing poopy pants. I was picking kids up and strapping them into all sorts of baby apparatus. I was wiping dirty hands and faces and cleaning up barf that I would for some reason try to catch in my hands when I heard it coming. You know you mothers do this. Why? As if we can save our carpet/couch/bedding from the flu. And oh the flu, the part of parenting that NO ONE warned us about.
My baby is now 10 and my twins are teenagers (!). Despite the fact that those first few years sometimes felt like an eternity, time is really starting to pick up speed. Only one more year in elementary school for my youngest and the two older boys are 2/3 done with middle school. High school is right around the corner. Sure, we have new situations we deal with now – from braces to acne, from discovering girls to all of the smells. Side note: boys smell.
I can only speak for myself when I say, YES, we still have challenges, but NO they are nothing like those physical early years. God bless you moms in the thick of it. It is hard. I stand with you in solidarity. #momlivesmatter
Earlier this summer we took our boys on vacation to Mexico. We used to call going places with our children “trips” because “vacation” implies rest and relaxation. There was never any of that on those trips. We had fun, we enjoyed the kids. They had a blast, but that was not vacation. We’d come home far more tired than when we left. We needed vacation days to recover from vacation.
This year’s “vacation” was different. In defense, I’d say the past couple of years have been different but this year I really sat back and took notice. My kids were never terribly picky eaters but now they eat anything, and everything. Oh boy can they eat. Dinner out now is actually delightful. The kids can read their own menus, order their own food and feed themselves. I also noticed the “por favor” and “gracias” without us having to remind them. No dropping food. No knocking over cups. No handywipe table-side baths at the end. Only downside? Our bills have increased dramatically since no one orders from the kiddy menu any longer.
The time at the resort was different too. Derek could golf and I could exercise while the kids slept, lazed around and got themselves breakfast. At the pool we could just sit and relax while the kids kayaked, swam, and played with other kids they met. There were quite a few families there with babies and young kids and Derek and I just looked at them and then at each other. We adored our babies, but Mexico with littles? That’s a whole different game.
Back to last Saturday which may seem unrelated except in my mind where I have this running theme of “my little boys are becoming young men” and “all that hard work is starting to pay off.”
One of my boys recently mentioned he’d like to learn to play the guitar. As athletes raising a house full of athletes, we were surprised. No one in our family is particularly musically inclined. We certainly wanted to encourage him though, especially when it started with “I’ve been thinking about playing the guitar. I wondered if it would be weird since I’m mostly a sports kid, but then in Bible class we were learning about how David played music for Saul to settle his spirit and (being named David) I thought that was kind of speaking to me (paraphrased).” Wow! OK. I will find a guitar instructor, pronto.
It took some time to find someone and we had a few delays so he just started his lessons two weeks ago. Days after his first lesson he attended youth group and they announced worship team tryouts. He comes home and says “I’m going to try out.” Being the loving and supportive mother I am I say “You know you’ve only had one lesson right? Do they know that?” He says he was told anyone could try out, regardless of whether they had any experience. He was ready to take that at face value.
So he gets one more lesson under his belt and he plans to go to tryouts. I had intended to drop him off and pick him back up. The leaders said I could just hang out. I was nervous for my son… But, well, OK.
Each of the kids went up on the stage in the huge church sanctuary one at a time. The youth pastor and music ministry leader asked the kids questions about themselves, their faith walk, and their interest in music. No canned questions. They asked everyone different things in a free flow Q&A. Of course I was dying to hear my young man’s answers. He spoke up, he answered them confidently, and he shared things about his faith I’d never even heard him say. My mama heart was beating out of my chest with pride.
Then came the actual “audition.” Gulp. They knew about his “experience” and had chatted with him when he came in. Yet, they wanted him to give it a shot. So my boy sat down in a chair on a stage by himself and played the opening chords for Smoke on the Water. He finished. He said “that’s all I really know” and he smiled.
Tears rolled down my face and my boy stood on that stage and beamed with pride.
God whispered to my heart “Mom, you are doing a great job. All that hard work is paying off. Keep seeking me. Trust me with your boys.”
Moms of littles, keep seeking Him. Keep trusting him with your choices and with your kids. He will not leave you nor forsake you and He will take your kids by the hand and lead them on their own journey, apart from you.
Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
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